Always the mom

I ran into one of my child's friends tonight while out at Art Hop. She is an effusive person, a point proven when she gave me an enormous, enveloping hug as if she had not seen me in years. She always tugs at my heart, as I know she has no semblance of a good relationship with her father, mush less her mother. She knows she is always welcome in my home, and I hope now more than ever she takes me up on coming over. The man I saw her with is a musician who I know through my boyfriend, and they, meaning he and my boyfriend, are about the same age. If you read the description of my blog and you figure that my young man is a little bit older than me, you will see why I am writing. I find this "man's" troll-like behavior despicable and see him as a leering creep preying on vulnerable girls. No one can convince me that he can get anything out of this "relationship" other than things I do not want to imagine. As I write, the professional part of my brain is going places where I don't venture with people i know socially. I do not diagnose friends, I do not piece together in my mind the broken bits of the people I care about because those are theirs to share only if they wish. I purposefully keep at bay the curiosity that helps me as a social worker because I will become emotionally exhausted, and it's just not right. What this beautiful girl needs is a mom, someone to tell her she has no need to be a vessel for anyone, that she is strong, talented, kind, and most of all, valuable. I wanted to take her home in my car and simultaneously hug her while yelling at her for making such a poor choice. Maybe she really does not know any better and feels this is what she deserves. I have no place to tell her she is making a mistake; I am not her mother nor anyone to whom she needs to answer. I am just someone who cares what happens to her, and I hope her heart hears me.